19-year-old Laquoia Simmons had a big night a while back: she met and interviewed Professor Cornel West, the famous 'interpreter of the African-American experience,' advocate for social justice, philosopher and critic. She reflects on her trip to Sonoma State University, and discusses what it was like to be an 'at-risk' young woman meeting a writer who writes so much about the so-called 'at-risk' population.
Behind The Scenes Essay
By Laquoia Simmons
Since doing the Cornel West story some things have changed and some haven't. I've since gotten a better job that I think might bring me more security. I've been doing a little more traveling, but mostly just working trying to pay the bills and survive. Some of my friends have gone back to jail and some have gotten out. The majority of them are trying to stay out this time, but they're always somehow getting pulled back. One of my closest friends got many months in San Quentin for violating parole- just because he was backing this kid up in a stupid little fight over nothing but colors. What a waste. When he was out he would be with his friends and they would talk all the time about being locked up. Almost like it was camp. They had learned all kinds of things, they knew every rule, all the right words -a private club. Inside they were smart and knew how to make things and were proud of it. They were good at it -being inside. On the outside, they got turned away at job interviews and stopped by the police all the time. What place would you like better if you were them? But that's just the trap we live in, I guess.
I've also had a deeply intense discussion with a good friend of mine about some of the comments and issues Cornel West talked about in the story I did and I've come to realize this world is nothing but a big puzzle or drug, everybody trying to find their way, everybody blind or running from their harsh reality that would be way too overwhelming to even face.
Something I learned that hadn't changed since the story was some people's obvious ignorance. In the West story I mentioned how I was driving and some guys called me 'nigger' when they passed me on the road. Recently I was put into a similar situation when 'kicking it' with my friends, or at least people that I thought were my friends. One friend was out of cigarettes and was asking around if anyone had some. Another person had Newports and offered those and then I heard, 'I don't want any of those nigger cigarettes.' I was the only black person in the room so all the attention was drawn to me after the comment. I was in a really awkward position. A part of me wanted to get up and leave, a part of me wanted to beat the shit out of the girl who said it, even though I don't think her intention was to offend me. But instead I did nothing but just sit there and think about what I should have done. It made me feel really unsure about myself. I wish I would've had Cornel West on speed-dial at that moment. I'm sure he would've had a great answer to my problem.
As far as my family life goes, it's all pretty much the same. We're all being thrown into situations and forced to deal or make the least we can out of them. My dad's turned 'all bad' since the story, but it's okay. It's not like I was expecting the best from him. Lately I've just been trying to get a handle on this roller-coaster life of mine. Trying to figure out the who, what, why, where, and when about me. Who knows maybe I'll turn out to be the first female president or a great icon. I could even be that face you see on a great big picture in a hall in a great big company in a place as far away as New York. Kind of like the one I saw of Mr. West at WNYC when I completed one of my life's dreams and finally saw New York City. It's all about getting yourself out there, I guess, but then what you do with what you find out there.
Laquoia Simmons. 19 years old. Ridgeway High Graduate. ('Sure, after they lost hella credits of mine.') Currently JCPenny stocker. If you like her story, be her next braiding client and write any advice on doing a story about sex workers and prostitution (her next project).
|
Discuss Show
Email a Friend
Print Page